Memories Of Santa ...

Christmastime, for me, brings many memories of  childhood Christmases.   It was celebrated in our  home in a cultural, rather than religious way, although I was always asked by neighborhood churches to play piano at their holiday programs.  At our house -- full of hustle and bustle -- there were family members from both my parents' families, who would come by to visit and bring me gifts.  My mother, always the gracious hostess, would manage to serve a bountiful dinner to any and all who showed up.  I remember my great-aunts; they were ladies on my father's side who were elegantly dressed and coiffed; they almost always brought me coloring books.  My great uncles were scarcer and, when they were in attendance, were on the quiet side. My "regular" aunts and uncles, though, were quite lively and interesting ... they were from my mother's side. One such uncle, I clearly recall, was the bad boy of the family and brought with him an air of scary excitement when he appeared at the door.  Sometimes I would hide when he visited.  

As I grew up and into my teens, my own friends and their families became most of my Christmas and holidays weren't celebrated much anymore in my own home, due to family problems.  Later, I was married and holidays revolved around children.  So the essence of my own, personal Christmastime nostalgia centers on the magical years during which I was from about age seven through nine.  And the "event" that stands out in my memory and makes me smile was brought about by my father.

Daddy, though very personable and well-liked, was not a warm and fuzzy person; my relationship with him was one I'd describe as an aloof friendship; he would occasionally buy me a treat or spend a few minutes talking with me.  So I was greatly surprised and touched by the playfulness of his Christmas spirit, which appeared two Christmases in a row back then.  

Lying in my bed on Christmas Eve, I wanted to believe Santa Claus was coming, even though the logistics didn't make sense to me.  My mother would tell me to go to bed because she thought she had heard Santa's bells and she didn't want him to skip our house.  I would lie there with my own version of sugar plums dancing in my head :)  And this I was doing.  I had heard my parents' voices talking in muted tones in the kitchen.  All at once, I heard the sound of bells jingling outside.  They sounded very clear and sharp in the cold New England night air, especially as there was snow on the ground.  I listened --  the bells paused -- and then began jingling again, this time under my window and then moving toward our backyard.  How exciting! Could it be Santa?  But I resisted the urge to sit up in my bed, let alone look out the window.  I didn't want to break the spell!  I realized in those moments, that my serious, aloof father was playing Santa because his own inner child wanted to bring me Christmas delight :)  I was thrilled and so happy.  He repeated the performance the following year, running (my father was athletic) across our land jingling the bells  :)         

Now, many years later, the family scene has completely changed, and with it Christmas.   Now it's mostly a quiet time.  My dog, in her twelfth year, prances in her red sweater.  I dress Fiona, my ficus tree, in colored lights. We play some holiday music.  I make a quiche that has become traditional for me over the last 20 or more years.  I enjoy exchanging holiday greetings with friends and strangers.  But in the distant past lies that spark ... my memories of Santa, that warms the magic of Christmas Eve for me.    

Yips And Howls ...

... well, I AM the Lady Wolf, so yips and howls prevail sometimes :)

First The Yips --  I'm getting ready to record two new songs.  Song inspirations, whether originals or covers, almost always come to me in twos and usually are very contrasting from each other in terms of mood, tempo, concept, genre.  I'll be practicing my arrangements of them again tonight before bedtime as that familiar excitement mounts!   

A Yip That Is A Tip -- Today I found a wonderful place to shop for Christmas items and gifts and trees.  It is the KARM (Knox Area Rescue Ministries) Christmas Store on Downtown West in west Knoxville.  The array of items is wonderful and so much fun to explore.  Perhaps best of all, the proceeds go toward the meals that KARM provides for the homeless and hungry here in Knoxville.  If you want a great holiday tree or gift or novelty item at an unbelievably low price, you will love the KARM Christmas Store.  Also, it is spacious and not crowded.  

Holiday Spirit --  We're about to enter the official week before Christmas. This year I've been so involved in my residential move -- getting this place ready  (lots of repairs and updates were needed) and closing and saying goodbye to my former residence (my favorite charming window where I liked to sit, my shrubs and trees that could not be moved, the Loft where I wrote many a spirited blog post) -- that I didn't know if I'd have any holiday spark. But I do ... and am pleased about that.  Gearing myself up for it.  I plan to make my traditional holiday quiche and some other goodies.  

Greater Good -- This organization's website is another awesome place to shop, especially if you like to shop on the Internet. Gifts of every kind are offered by groups served under the umbrella of The Greater Good, such as the Rainforest site, the Animal Rescue site, and others. I ordered and promptly received a wonderful bracelet for myself that is engraved with the words "Bless This Woman".  This classy bracelet helps me remember that I'm a woman even when I'm hoisting heavy boxes and moving furniture.  I like being a woman; in fact, sometimes I love it :) So I wear my bracelet proudly!  Their website is at http://www.greatergood.com.  The other organizations I've just mentioned are at http://www.therainforestsite.com/click and http://www.theanimalrescuesite.com/click. Visiting these sites daily and clicking on their buttons saves acreage in the rainforest and provides food for shelter animals, respectively.

And Now, A Howl Of Sadness -- The Federal government has voted to permanently remove all gray wolves from protection, meaning these beautiful animals are now being murdered by the hundreds, by all kinds of unsavory methods.  This is our government bowing to the special interest groups -- namely, people who like to shoot at live targets and cattle ranchers who have an unrelenting hatred for all wolves (cattle ranchers have always had the legal right to shoot any wolf who was thought to pose a danger to cattle).  Wolves have just found their way back from the brink of extinction and now are being destroyed again.  As of last evening, the Feds were collecting public comments regarding also removing the red wolf from protection.  I sent in my comment, which boiled down to "For God's sake, don't kill the wolves!"  Actually I said more than that, but I did include that phrase.  Please, if you care about the wild, intelligent, mystical, beautiful wolf, check out the website of the hard-working group, Howling For Wolves at http://www.howlingforwolves.org, located in Minnesota.

The Night Sky --  It has been so beautiful this week, especially with yesterday's full moon and nearby Jupiter, whose moons can be seen swirling around the planet, even with my little binoculars!

Wishing To All The Very Best --  For this holiday season and the new year.  Let's sing, dance, have joy, meditate, mindfully help those less fortunate -- and pray for peace, compassion, and good will.         

Thanksgiving ... A Beautiful Holiday –

In and of itself, Thanksgiving is a wonderful holiday. It’s always beneficial to us, as individuals and as a species, to take the time and set the occasion for meditating on those things for which we are grateful, those things with which we are blessed. Regrettably, this holiday is used, for the most part, as the book-end on the left side of the shelf -- with Christmas considered to be the prize being shopped for, showcased, supported (by the book-ends) and New Year’s Day is used as the right-side book-end. To me, that left-side book-end deserves center stage. In addition to everything else for which my spirit gives thanks ... to all that is good, thanks be for the breath, the very essence, of life!

Christmas Card Of The Mind --

Yesterday, for a little while, I took the nostalgia trip down the lane of Christmas Past. When I was very young, my paternal grandmother played a prominent role in things festive. She was a wonderful pal and playmate and really enjoyed talking and drawing and glueing and cutting out paper shapes at the kitchen table. She had a nice smile that made her eyes twinkle. Her eyes were kind of almond-shaped (like mine are). Living in Connecticut, we usually had snow for the holidays; in fact, we often had a lot of snow ... and in Connecticut, it can hang around into mid-April, in layers of old, crusty re-frozen, and new snow. Anyway, my mother had a great sense of humor when it came to what Santa would put in the "stockings hung by the (pretend) chimney (we didn’t have a fireplace) with care". Every Christmas, there would be an apple, an orange, a "book" of Lifesaver candies, and a tube of toothpaste, among other little trinkets! Sometimes on Christmas Eve, my father would walk around the outside of the house, jingling bells, especially as he passed my bedroom window. He did it mostly to have fun, though it was under the guise of cautioning me that Santa was approaching and all should be quiet in the house. So I would always comment, the next day, that I’d heard Santa, and I know my father was delighted. My mother would cook a big dinner on Christmas. Actually, I remember thinking of the season that ran from Thanksgiving to Christmas to New Year’s Day as "The Big Three" in terms of her dinners. We always stayed home for these holidays and our house was like a train station – with friends and relatives trudging up the hill by foot or, occasionally, driving up the hill if there wasn’t fresh snow or ice on it. It was a different time then, unhurried, and not very commercial in those days preceding malls and discount stores. Memories of Christmas Past bring a mix of feelings, especially as we recall the people, things, ways, that have exited – and smile at those that now grace ... our lives. It all makes a colorful, picturesque, and mindful holiday card.

Holiday Greetings~~

As you may know (if you've been following my blog), this has been an especially different kind of year for me and has provided me with new and major opportunities for growth, introspection, enlightened perspective, and even humor!

Escaping the church shootings with traumatic, yet minor injuries (compared to the severe injuries and deaths of other people), I've realized more than ever, during the months since that day in July, that the cadence of time keeps rolling along and we need to make the most of every minute of every hour of every day of our lives. Each moment is special and precious, even those moments that seem, on the surface, to be quite ordinary.

I wish you a joyous, merry, awesome holiday season and a new year of peace, health, love and light ...

Celebrate life!

Just Thinking ...

At this time of the year, regardless of one’s religious or spiritual persuasion, it’s a tough time for people who have experienced or are going through the throes of loss – whether loss of a loved one through death or other separation, loss of a job, or in these troubled economic times – loss of their home or their retirement funds. It’s also a hard time to be dealing with illness. I’ve heard from two very dear people recently that they’ve been sick with shingles, that grown-up off-shoot of chickenpox. Another friend just lost his job. Job loss means not only lost income, but also a lost part of one’s identity; I remember that well, when I had that experience five years ago. Changing horses, career paths, and philosophies can follow on the heels of a lost job; happily, my friend has plans for training in a new and wonderful career! However we approach the festivities of the holiday season, there will be, for most of us, that thread of seriousness as we look back, look forward, and touch base with our values. Our values – maybe that’s what it’s really all about.

No Justification For This Craziness –

The entire concept of stores promoting early morning opening "door-busters" to "shoppers" who wait for hours in parking lots and then stampede like a herd of panicked cattle on the day after Thanksgiving, has been repugnant to me for years. It points to the epitome of crassness that people can exhibit in the name of holiday shopping. That an innocent maintenance worker from a temporary agency could be trampled and killed by people smashing in the Wal-Mart door, is unconscionable and disgusting. Apparently, it will take far more than a failing economy to halt these crazed shoppers and the stores that feed their frenzy.

Descent Into Winter's Night ...

A few weeks ago, I brought my houseplants back indoors, situating them wherever I could in my relatively small house until next Spring. (I say "small" because I'd lived in a large home for many years before moving to my current abode). This time of year is such a mixed bag of feelings for me. Yet, it is more nostalgic and introspective than any other time. There seems to be more clarity to my thoughts, matching in character the brilliantly colored trees and the more defined silhouettes of nature. This seems to be a time for plans to form and incubate ... maybe to put in a tickler file for January, as the holiday season will be fast upon us.

Whatever our religious persuasion (or not), the fervor and frenzy of holiday shopping will probably kick in, as usual, for most people. I guess for some, shopping can be sort of a magic pill -- both exciting and mind-numbing; maybe it can even be a temporary antidote for fear and/or future shock.

It strikes me oddly, though, to comprehend Santas, twinkling strings of lights, and merchandising all over the place, juxtaposed to reality: the tragedy and malevolence of the war, the impoverishing of many Americans who need a health care system, a dishonest and manipulative government, and our environment's burgeoning problems.

As I write this, I look out the window at a gray November sky, the prelude to nature's cloak of winter. I think about my hopes for peace, for honesty, for reason -- in our country and the world. I realize that the thing I feel most able to celebrate at this time, is the existence of hope. Hope can be ever-alive, even in the absence of optimism. In that spirit, my "dove of peace" tree ornament hangs (year-round) in my music room window.

May we all give each other the gift of peace. Where there is the ability to reason, there can be peace.

Peace to all creatures, all nations, all people.